When things are going good for you, it is hard to tell who your true friends are. IT IS ONLY WHEN THINGS GO BAD FOR YOU, WHEN YOU KNOW WHO YOUR TRUE FRIENDS REALLY ARE.

Because frankly, they are the only one(s) left.

In the following video Dr. Jordan Peterson does a speech talking about his new book “12 Rules For Life” in which one of the rules “Rule #2: Make Friend With People Who Want The Best For You”.

Three false friends came to Job. In a series of speeches that fill many pages of the book of Job, the men wrongly tried to convince Job that God was punishing him for hidden sins. They even claimed that God neither finds pleasure in his servants nor puts trust in them. Job rejected their faulty reasoning. With confidence, Job declared that he would maintain his integrity down to death!

How would you feel if someone who was suppose to love you told you they hate you, your worthless, embellishes the truth and spread lies about you to your friend who 99.7% of them turn against you and many of them spread these rumors.

How would you feel if everyone one you loved turned against you? Many people would kill themselves after something like this…This is what happened to me as you see in the article “How To Overcome From Emotional Abuses”.

However, what does not kill you, makes you stronger.

When a baby is born if you ONLY take care of it’s basic needs but do not touch it, the baby will die in a matter of days. In the following TED TALKS video shows that loneliness is as DEADLY to you as smoking.

You could exercise, eat right, take care of yourself however, if you are not getting the proper attention and touch from those around you this is as unhealthy for you as living an healthy life style.

You may not exercise, eat right and take care of yourself the way you should however,  if you have those around you who love you and nuture you, you may be in better health than someone who lives a so-called healthy lifestyle.

We have emotional, environmental and physical stresses which are exasperated when we are alone and have no one to turn to.

Everyone situation in different however, in my case some of my false friend would spread false-information to doubt myself. Let me explain, my at one time best friend who I had not seen in over 5 years told me the good things that people see in me however, he also told me these people won’t say anything to your face but what he said to me made me put doubts in my mind just like job…

You may had experienced something much worse however, because I read the book “The 48 Laws Of Power” which you can listen to at the following link >> which is designed to arm you with the knowledge to protect yourself when people take advantage of you.

Error, group does not exist! Check your syntax! (ID: 8) I at one time was an innocent person always looking for the best in people however, I know the warning signs of what people will do when they try to manipulate me and try to take advantage of me.

I can get upset and rant and rave or as Niccolo Machiavelli put it: “ See things as they are, and not as you wish they were”.

When someone does this to you, not only do you have to be aware of what they are doing but you also have to protect yourself worth.

If you have false friends like this you may ask yourself what is wrong with me. Sure, we all have areas where we can make improvement however, you need to find better friends.

You may be familiar with the term it is lonely at the top. Now that expression is most stated as you have to climb over people to reach the top, when in reality the better you became in one or more areas of your life the harder and harder it will be to find true friend because the changes you have made in life is making them feel bad about themselves in which some of these people will try to maniple you and destroy you.

There is a line from the new Star Wars, Solo movie – “Assume everyone will betray you and you’ll never be disappointed”. This is a sad way to look at life however, this is what job went through.

1) Make New Friends

The problem is not you, but rather you made friend with the wrong people, as Dr. Jordan Peterson book the “12 Rules For Life” suggests that you find friends who want the best for you.

Sure, you got somethings to work on however, friends do not abandon you when you need them most.

The average person knows about 200 people however, they are close with only about 6-7 of them.

So you should go out and make new friends. If you go out to the mall, local Starbucks, and different places around town and met 100 new people you will have 3-4 of them who will become really good friends.

2) Emotions Make You Week

If you have found friendship with people who do not want the best for you, this may devastate you.

A bad friendship is like a bad relationship or marriage which some people say: “They would rather be alone than in a bad marriage”. The same is true with bad friendships. Error, group does not exist! Check your syntax! (ID: 9)

In the article “How To Overcome Emotional Abuse” I explain my failures of dealing with emotional abuse, in which devastated me however, I was emotionally weak.

I could either wallow in my own self pity or become a stronger person.

I have adopted many of the principles of the Navy Seals and one of the things I learned from the Seals is if you volunteer to put yourself in pain you will have the strength to endure when real pain comes your way.

Because of the influence of former Navy Seal I started running endurance races, talking cold showers, and putting myself in as much mental pain and I can so I can endure the real pain when it comes my way.

I recently ran the LA Marathon a 26.2 miles race. After you have prepared you body to run an endurance race the only thing you have to endure is your mind. The mind will give up long before the body.

3) Re-Build Your Self Esteem

Depending on how sever your bad friendship are, you may need to rebuild your self esteem.

In the words of Muhammad Ali “Let Me Show You How Great I Am”. There will always be someone to point out your flaws however, only you can tell yourself how great you are, if no one else see this in you.

Muhammad Ali reflected on his positive points.

Some people will accuse you of being egotistical however, you need to built up a health self-esteem.

One of the best ways to rebuild your self esteem is through self talk or what is also known as affirmations.

In the following video Louise Hays says: “With every word and every thought you project your future”, you’ve heard the term: “Tell a lie, so many times you start to believe it”.

When you look at your life you may see no reason, to believe you can expect anything different however, once you believe life can be different by telling yourself it can be different then you will start acting in harmony with those goals.

For more step on how to rebuild your self esteem check out the article “How To Out Smart Your Circumstances”.

4) Brotherhood

If you have false friends, this may cause you to ask yourself: “What’s wrong with me” however, the real problem is you have the wrong friends.

Only after studying the principles of the Navy Seals do I understand what it means to be a friend. The call themselves a brotherhood, in BUD training your job is to make sure your buddy does not quit, in battle you are not fighting for your life, you are fighting for your buddies life, and they are fighting for your life.

If you are familiar with the story of Job, the devil struck him with sickness, he lost his livelihood, his children died in a weather storm however, he regained his wealth and then some and was blessed with 120 years added to his life.

The lesson, the best is yet to come.

After I moved back to California I have developed some of the closest friendships I have developed in my entire life.

I have never felt so close to a group of people as I have with my new friends.

Christopher Brown

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